Anyone here a Dwarf Fortress player?  If so, please step forward!  If not, why not?  It's a lot like Minecraft, only it's a top-down ASCII view, you (indirectly) control a team of (manic-depressive, alcoholic) dwarves to do things (when they feel like it) dwarven women charge into battle using their newly-born babies as body armor, and you will invariably have no idea what's going on for at least your first five fortresses, which will all die spectacularly slowly due to thirst and rampant capybaras.